← Queer Scar Care · ← Chest Surgery Resources · ← Ways of Wa/onderment


<aside>

This circle has existed—and it could exist again.

A tender, body-led space for meeting the grief, relief, joy, numbness, desire, pleasure, and contradictions held in a masculinized chest and its surgery story.

</aside>

An invitation of sorrows and joy

Top surgery can be wanted, life-giving, complicated, disappointing, relieving, erotic, grief-filled—or several of these at once.

The Masculinizing Top Surgery Grief & Pleasure Circle was created and facilitated by Ro Rose in 2023 as both an intimate in-person gathering and a three-week online circle. It offered something that medical preparation and post-operative instructions rarely make room for: being witnessed in the full emotional, sensory, relational, and erotic complexity of bodily change.

“An invitation of sorrows and joy in your top surgery story.”

This was not a demand for a tidy transformation narrative. Presence and witnessing counted as participation. Every practice was an invitation: something to accept, adapt, queer, or decline.


What the circle held

Grief and grieving

Noticing what has been lost, changed, interrupted, protected, or left unnamed—and exploring grieving as active care rather than a problem to solve.

Pleasure and desire

Turning toward relief, joy, sensation, curiosity, self-touch, scar care, erotic possibility, and what the body wants to grow toward.

Story and witnessing

Sharing top-surgery stories without comparison, fixing, or interrogation—and choosing how one wants to be seen.

Body-led integration

Chest-focused noticing, nervous-system resourcing, movement, reflection, ritual, and practices for staying connected without forcing.

The shape of the original gatherings

An intimate in-person circle

The in-person gathering used a talking-circle structure, breath, music and movement, chest-focused body awareness, personal objects, storytelling, shared witnessing, guided chest massage, and a closing ritual. Participants were invited to nest: to bring layers, blankets, tactile objects, a notebook, and something connected to their top-surgery journey.

The invitation was intimate yet spacious and without pressure. Removing a shirt, touching the chest, speaking, moving, or simply witnessing were always choices.

A three-week online circle and course

The online version unfolded through three live 90-minute gatherings supported by a five-chapter course:

  1. Welcome — why the course existed, who and where it came from, container setting, opening questions, and scope.
  2. Being With — grief and grieving, the first shared circle, chest noticing, rituals for challenging emotions, and moon-cycle grieving practices.